im about as happy as oj after his trial
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
