it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
