walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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