Your mouth is God's brothel.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
They left me at home... I'm a liability
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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