God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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