why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
one might say we're banned from that church
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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