yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
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