Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Randomize
