glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
