she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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