batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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