kristin has been a bad kristin
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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