I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
