The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I cut my penus on the lid.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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