You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize