I'd wear matching sweaters with you
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
