That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize