i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
being pregnant is like rehab
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
The air taste purple.
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