that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Randomize
