You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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