Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
