David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Randomize
