a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Randomize
