I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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