i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
