is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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