so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
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