Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
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