Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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