My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
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