Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize
