I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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