You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
