I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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