Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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