3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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