youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
