my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
