He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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