Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
MIDGETS
????
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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