Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
