I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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