So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
this hospital has no fireball
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
