i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
