Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
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