I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
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