Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Randomize
