This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize