also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
