My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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