just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize