Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
